The 26th year.

Today I turned 26.  Don't ask me how I feel about that, because I don't actually know yet.  On one hand, I feel soooo old.  And yet on the other hand, I feel as though there is no way that I could be that old.  I'm mean, just yesterday...  I don't know.  But, I don't know.

That is how I feel about today.  

My 25th year has been one of the hardest, most painstakingly long, gruesome years ever.  I am so glad that it is over.  

When I blew out my candles today, I didn't have a specific wish in mind... And yet I did. 

That is the confusion of the 26th year I believe.  

Happy birthday to me.

Attitude

I've realized that my attitude is directly influenced by who I spend time with. (Shocking, it is not.). So when I try to spend time with people who will build me up, they blow me off.  So, in order to have a good attitude, I must??? 

Sorry...  This day has been weird, and this doesn't make any sense.  I just needed to vent a bit... Not that it did any good.  

Bleh.

Chapstick

I have become someone that HAS to have something on their lips 24/7 since I was a senior in high school, or thereabouts.  About 2-3 years ago I finally found the PERFECT chapstick, and have faithfully been using it ever since.  I mean, I have a tube in my purse, night stand, and a drawer in my living room.  And I use it all the way down to the bottom of the tube- when there is nothing more to get out.  

Maybelline Baby Lips. 

Seriously.  

I would but a few tubes at a time- just to keep stocked up.  I hate running out. 

Recently, I was down to none, so I put it on my list for target.

It was $4.99 a stick.

No.

When I first started buying it, it was $2.99.  Last fall it was $3.99, and I still bought maybe two...  But now?

No.  

So. 

Maybelline- if you want a spokesperson, I would love to be your girl.  

But I can't justify paying that much.  If my paycheck tripled...  Maybe. 

But no.  

As someone who uses your product mutiple times, DAILY-  it's just too much to pay.

I was going to tweet about this, but them I realized that 140 characters were not going to be enough.

I ♥️ chapstick.

Sooo

I have had this urge to write for the last 4 months or so.  I have chosen to ignore that urge, and I am sad that I ignored it.

So much of my life has changed-  I don't even know where to begin.

So, I will post a picture for the time being.

That's about it.

In lieu of writing an actual post, I will just post this picture that I took a screen shot of- and then wrote the words in and sent to my friends.  

Because I'm cool like that.  Also because I figured out how to use the cool apps on my phone for that.  

I started watching through The Office again, but this time like it is a documentary of actual people, not hollywood actors. 

It's bananas.

Fighting

There is so much shit going on.  But there are good things too.  I find myself focusing on the bad, and not the good.  Maybe someday I will be more upbeat-  I don't think today is that day though.
I am enjoying summer.  But at the same time I am kicking myself for other reasons.  It's dumb.
That's really all today.

gasp

I'm post two days in a row.  Whatevs.

Autumn heard from Nick in the wee morning hours and he said he was ok.

I have so much going through my head.

I am so relieved that he is confirmed safe.

I am so very heartbroken for the families that missing one person.

This deployment has hit so very close to my heart.

I don't quite know how to express how I feel quite yet.

Hug your loved ones extra tight.

You don't know how blessed you are to have them close to you.